Iris
by RosieRathbone
Summary: Bella expected the summer months to be full of fun trips out with friends and enjoying life without college. But when asked to 'babysit' the Autistic boy that nobody understands, she begins a journey that has Bella seeing life and love in a very different light. After all, opposites always attract. A/H.
1. Chapter 1

**IMPORTANT**: I planned this story back in summer and about a month ago my little sister was coincidently diagnosed with the exact condition that Edward has, so this story hits very close to home and I've finally decided to dust off the cobwebs and allow you all to read it.

Although this is something that I have to face daily, I am still very new to the subject of Autism and all the spectrums, so please don't attack me for the tiniest mistake that I might make. This is a story of fiction and so sometimes things might not seem as plausible if it were in real life, you get me?

**Disclaimer: **Everything related to 'Twilight' is all owned by Stephenie Meyer, Goo-Goo Dolls own 'Iris' and I own any made up character you come across and the plot.

_0-0_

_And I don't want the world to see me,  
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand.  
When everything's made to be broken,  
I just want you to know who I am_

'**Iris' – by, Goo-Goo Dolls.**

****_0-0_

**Chapter one.**

The smashing of china and raised voices broke Esme out of the daze she had fallen into and she went into the living room to see what the problem was. Standing at the doorway she saw her eldest son, Emmett, using his arms in defence as swinging punches came from her youngest son, Edward.

"Hey, hey, hey – Edward, calm down." Esme tried her best with calming words, but he ignored his mother's comfort and continued to do his best to punch his brother. It's not an easy case of pulling Edward off his brother, because, even though Esme isn't a small woman, her sons still stand at least half a foot taller and they are both muscly guys.

"Fuck off, man!" Emmett managed to get his hands on Edward's shoulders and used all his strength to push his brother away. Not expecting the force, Edward fell back, narrowly missing the wooden table behind him. "Jesus, you're insane!"

"_Emmett." _Esme scorned. She doesn't like to take sides, but they all know perfectly well that Edward can't control his temper and it isn't his fault.

"What? He's not normal!"

The angry nineteen year old then transformed into a timid child, not completely understanding the situation he was in, and only noting the pain in his backside. With teary eyes, Edward stood up and ran out of the room, desperately seeking security in his room, all alone. It has been almost ten years since his diagnosis with Autism (Asperger Syndrome to be precise) and even though they have had help with psychiatrists, therapy and have even found a special college for him to attend, every day is just as challenging for Edward, his family and anyone he encounters.

He didn't answer when Esme knocked at the door, but she entered anyway. She found Edward sitting cross legged on his bed, staring at the mattress with a bright green blanket around his shoulders; he rocked backwards and forwards slowly, not even responding to his mother's entrance.

"Do you want to tell me what happened, Edward?" No answer. "Did Emmett do something that you didn't like?"

Edward stared at the stray thread coming off his shirt and paid all his attention to pulling it free. "He ruins everything…" His voice was tight and laced in hate.

"What happened?" Trying her hardest to look after her clearly upset son, Esme perched on the edge of his bed, but said son shuffled backwards, to get further away.

"He took my sandwich…" Edward spoke so quietly, it was hard to hear what he said. "I made that sandwich for me because I was hungry and he took it and dropped the plate so it smashed."

Esme's facial expression showed how sad she was to hear his side – it's something that brother's do to tease one another, yet Edward didn't understand that Emmett was only teasing. He also couldn't decipher how his mother was feeling, and so went for the most obvious emotion to him. "Why are you so angry at me?!" He punched the bed hard with both fists, tears fell onto his lap.

"I'm not angry at you, sweetheart."

"Yes you are!"

Esme knew she was fighting a losing battle and chose to leave the situation, although unwillingly. "You stay here and calm down and I'll call you when dinner is ready, okay?"

"I don't want any stinking dinner." Again, Edward spoke more like a petulant child than a nineteen year old.

"Well you might change your mind later on." And with that, she left the room.

Edward is a very misunderstood being. Growing up everybody thought he was a spoilt child who lashes out if he didn't get his own way, or who you'd see standing in the school yard all by himself and think '_he's weird' _so you'd look for a new friend to make. But if you are one of the lucky few who Edward befriends, you'd see that he has the biggest heart and you just need to realise which way to act around him so as to not press any buttons or infuriate him.

It's because of his difficulty in reading facial expressions and emotions that's makes Edward social and communicative abilities with someone he doesn't know so much harder, this leads to anxiety and stress and voila, you have a short temper on your hands. These are not his only symptoms, but they are what cause him the biggest problem in everyday life.

Apart from his immediate family, there is only one other person who Edward trusts enough to talk openly to. And her name is Tanya.

**EdwardAMC: **Hello.

**TanyaBaby09: **Hey sweetie! How are you? :)

The two have never met, but they talk daily and Tanya promised Edward she would visit him soon. And she is his only friend; he needs her comfort like it is air.

**EdwardAMC: **Not very good.

**TanyaBaby09: **:( sorry to hear that. Want to tell me what happened?

**EdwardAMC: **Emmett ate my snack I punched him and he pushed me over. I hurt my butt, but it is okay now. He wasn't even hungry and I made that sandwich for me and not him.

**TanyaBaby09: **He doesn't understand you, precious. But I do, you can always come to me :)

**EdwardAMC: **I know.

**TanyaBaby09: **What are you plans for the summer?

**EdwardAMC: **Don't know. You should come to my house.

**TanyaBaby09: **Yeah, I'd love to, babes!

**EdwardAMC: **Cool.

**TanyaBaby09: **I have to go, but I'll talk to you later okay, babes?

**EdwardAMC: **Yeah. Bye.

**TanyaBaby09: **Bye! X

It doesn't matter where Tanya lives; a friend is a friend and that is all that Edward needs.

_0-0_

Dinner that evening went smoothly until Esme mentioned what the summer holidays held for everyone. She had been asked to renovate an old farm house in Vermont, which would mean having to spend almost half the holidays over there, and with her husband, Carlisle, working long shifts at the local hospital, there was only one thing Emmett was sure to be doing.

"I'm not being no fucking babysitter."

Carlisle cleared his throat, "I'm sorry, Emmett – we don't like how things have planned out, but there is no other option."

"Argh, come on! He's old enough to wipe his own ass when you're at work, dad. I have plans this summer!"

Although, technically, that is true, the last time Edward was left alone he managed to burn the kitchen down. Literally.

He was hungry (it is seldom that he isn't!) and saw an appetising pasta sauce in the cupboard. The pasta was boiling nicely and he was heating up the sauce when some splattered onto the kitchen counter. The mess didn't sit well with Edward, who grabbed a cloth to mop it up with. Unfortunately the corner of the cloth was left too close to the flame…

Since then, Esme and Carlisle haven't been too keen on leaving him alone. But they don't like putting all the responsibility on Emmett either.

"Maybe we could get one of his friends to -."

"—He doesn't have any friends, Carlisle." The two conversed in private.

"Well they're all back from college for the summer, surely they'll be someone he knows from high school who could help out."

As much as she loves her husband, Esme really wants to slap some sense into him sometimes. "Just because he knew them at high school doesn't mean they're friends. Edward is only going to feel comfortable around those… he trusts…" A brilliant plan came to mind. "Actually, I think I might have an idea…"

_0-0_

"Dad? I'm home!" Bella called out to her father whilst struggling through with her bulging suitcases.

Heavy footfalls were heard on the staircase, "Bells!" Charlie, her father, cheered, bringing his only child in for a much anticipated hug. "How's college going?"

"It's going great, thanks. Top in all my classes…"

"Adda girl! I'm ordering pizza for dinner that okay with you?"

After living in Seattle for a year, Bella noticed that her father's eating habits hadn't changed at all. "That's fine with me. I'm going to put my stuff away."

"Oh, hold on a second, Bells." Charlie called when Bella was already half way up the rickety stairs. "You have a message from Esme Cullen – you know The Cullens, right?" _Who doesn't know Forks' richest family? _Bella wanted to add, but simply nodded her response instead. "Yeah, well she's left a message on the phone just check it out when you can."

"Will do – thanks, Dad."

It took Bella just under an hour to get all of her clothes put away, the bed sheeted up and her room made to look like _her room _once again. Once everything was done, Bella went to check the awaited phone message.

"_Good evening, Bella, this is Esme Cullen phoning. I was wondering if it's possible for you to give me a call back once you get this? I have a proposal for you…"_

_0-0_

**Everything that Edward did/does in the future is based on my sister (expect she's 11, not 19). I know this doesn't seem much right now, but it's just because the story has barely started. If you would like to read more then please tell me; I'm a little hesitant, only because it's so personal to me.**


	2. Chapter 2

I want to thank you all so much for your incredible reviews! It is so humbling to know the support I have and that I can use this story to let out my frustration when the going gets tough at home.

I wanted to make my updates every Monday, but you guys blew me away, so I'm writing it now :)

**Disclaimer: **In case you all don't already know, Stephenie owns 'Twilight' and Goo-Goo Dolls own the song 'Iris'.

_0-0_

**Chapter two.**

Eight o'clock on the dot every morning, Esme knocks on Edward's door to gently awake him from his slumber. She tells him the time and that he has half an hour before he needs to wake up, ten minutes later she goes back again, says he now has twenty minutes and so on until the time reaches eight thirty. Edward sticks to a very precise routine and the tiniest change can cause something drastic.

"What time is it?" He mumbled, rubbing his face with both hands.

"It is eight thirty."

"No, what time is it?" He asked again, clearly not receiving the correct answer.

"Sorry, it is thirty-three minutes past eight."

"So…it is twenty-seven minutes before nine o'clock and at nine o'clock my TV show starts, but that normally starts at nine-oh-one, which means I have twenty eight minutes." To anybody else they'd probably think '_meh, I have twenty-five minutes or so,' _but with Edward it has to be exact, and, just like the routine, if he is a minute out for anything, it'll be almost like his whole routine going to pot.

Esme stood patiently watching her son internally plan his morning around a TV show. "Exactly," She smiled, before pointing at the chart tacked to his wall, "you have woken up," she touched the picture of a bed and an alarm clock, "you now have to have a shower and get dressed and then you can watch TV."

"Um…I don't think I want a shower…"

That is not an uncommon sentence for Esme to hear – Edward never wants to have a shower; he doesn't like the confined space and how his body changes from sudden heat to freezing cold when he exits. He wouldn't settle for a bath either, because he doesn't like how he washes himself with the same water that has just been contaminated with his 'dirt'. It is safe to say that general basic hygiene and getting him to cooperate with it is a struggle for Esme and her husband.

"But you didn't have one yesterday and so you need to get fresh and clean today."

He thought thoroughly over the pros and cons of having a shower. "Has Emmett had one yet?" He finally asked.

"No, he is still asleep."

That realisation made Edward feel a bit better, knowing that he would be the first one to use that shower that morning and that it wouldn't have steamed up with condensation – which is another thing he cannot stand.

"Okay. Can you tell me when it is three minutes to nine, please? I still need to get some milk before I watch TV." Edward doesn't use an alarm clock – the noise is too loud and it scares him if he isn't expecting it to go off.

"Absolutely. Would you like me to bring some milk up when you're having a shower?"

"No thank you, I can get it myself."

The two then left his room and split off to complete separate tasks.

_0-0_

After watching the episode of American Chopper, Edward went to have his breakfast in the half an hour before he starts practising the piano at ten. He picks out the same brown bowl, the same spoon with a slight dent in the handle and the same glass which had his name written in black print around the middle. He took his box of Fruit Loops and poured until the colourful 'O's were level with the rim. Along with the cereal, he had another glass of full fat milk.

"Do you remember that Bella Swan is coming over shortly?" Esme was loading the dishwasher when she asked.

"Yes."

From his blunt answer, she knew Edward was not pleased. "Is that okay? Do you remember Bella?"

He took a spoonful of Fruit Loops chewing _very _slowly. "I know who she is but I don't like her."

"What? Why not? Bella is a lovely girl." In all the years Esme has lived in Forks, she has never heard anyone say that they don't like Bella or her father, Charlie.

"She broke my pencil and didn't say sorry. I…I, um…she…" Edward lost his concentration for a minute. "She asked to borrow it, I said yes, then she dropped it and the lead broke and she didn't say sorry."

"Oh, well did she sharpen it again?"

"Yes, she went to the bin and made it pointy again, but she didn't say sorry. It is my pencil, not hers."

"Edward you can't not like someone for that. I'm sure she didn't mean it."

Completely ignoring his mother's preference towards Bella, Edward took another spoonful and asked his own question. "Why is she coming?"

"Remember I said Dad and I are working a lot this summer? Well Bella is going to come here and keep you company until Dad gets home, so today we're going to give it a trial run – to make sure you'll be okay when I have to leave next week."

"Yes, but why her? I don't like Bella."

"And I'm sorry you feel that way, but at college she is studying Child Psychology which means she understands how you feel?"

"Does her brain not work right?"

Esme instantly took his question as ridicule, stating that Bella is stupid for wanting to help, but then she understood what he meant, does Bella understand Edward because she has a disorder as well. "No, Bella is learning about it though. And, sweetheart, your brain works perfectly fine; you just think differently than other people, and that makes you extra special."

"Okay."

"And, maybe when she arrives, you can tell Bella about the pencil incident. I'm sure she will apologise and then you can learn to like her."

Edward didn't make any promises. According to him, Bella made a sinful act which he could never forgive her for, especially because she didn't say sorry.

_0-0_

Bella arrived precisely when she said she would, and after her quick greeting with Esme, she was taken upstairs to Edward's room. Beautiful piano music was heard coming from behind his bedroom door. It sounded too fresh to be from a CD, so she had to assume it was Edward playing – something she never knew about during high school; his talent for playing.

It had been a year since she last saw Edward, yet he hadn't changed a bit – he still wore dark blue sweat pants, white socks and a plain tee. His hair still held all its cowlicks, but she doubted they would ever disappear.

Right enough, as soon as Esme knocked, the piano playing stopped and Edward was found sitting in front of one when they entered. He hid his eyes behind a messy, bronze fringe.

"Hey Edward, it's nice to see you again." Bella said brightly, knowing that her enthusiasm can make a child with Autism feel less daunted in a scary situation, so she prayed that it would work with him. But it didn't, he never said a word.

"Edward, sweetie, do you remember what I asked you to tell Bella?"

He stood from his stool and took one tiny step forward. "I don't like you." He spoke flatly.

Esme decided to give the two some privacy and backed away slowly. Bella, taken aback with his direct opinion could only widen her eyes.

"I'm…I'm sorry if I did anything for you not to like me…"

"You broke my pencil and didn't say sorry. You sharpened it but it was _my _pencil and you didn't say sorry."

From studying his disorder Bella completely understands why Edward would take such an offence; the smallest thing, that wouldn't bother anyone else, can turn their mood sour, especially (like in this case) if something happened to their belongings.

"Oh Edward, I'm so sorry. Honestly, I never meant to hurt you. I really hope you can forgive me, because I would like to be your friend."

Edward never responded, but he understood that she would happily become his friend if he wanted that to happen.

Bella slowly made her way over to the piano. "This is lovely…" She went out to brush her finger tips off the black shine.

"Don't touch my stuff!"

Bella brought her hand back so fast it felt like she had been slapped with his words.

"S-sorry…"

A _ding _was heard coming from his open laptop on a desk to the right of her. Edward practically leaped to his computer and a beautiful smile graced his lips when he read the message on screen.

"Who are you talking to?" Asked Bella as she watched him type away on the keyboard.

"My friend."

That made Bella smile – she never remembered seeing Edward with a friend when they were in High School. "What is your friend's name?" She knew not to identify a gender; the fifty per cent chance she got it wrong is a fifty per cent chance that he'll lose his temper.

"Tanya."

"That's a lovely name."

Edward spun around in a flash. "She isn't my girlfriend, and I'm not her boyfriend."

"No, no…I never implied that you were."

"Because I can't have a girlfriend," Bella didn't want to know the answer, but she found herself asking what he meant anyway. "Emmett said that I wouldn't know what to do with a girlfriend, so I can't have one." That explanation broke her heart; he was under the impression that he won't know how to love someone, just because he doesn't understand what it means to be in love with them. Well, one thing is for certain, she was going to help him see otherwise. He might be Autistic, but that doesn't mean he is incapable of feeling human emotions.

_0-0_

"Do you have a cell phone?"

Bella had been at the Cullen house for an hour and in that time Edward had made great progress. They were watching another episode of American Chopper when the question was asked.

"Yes, I have a cell phone, why?"

Edward grabbed the silver phone from his bedside table. "If you give me your number and I give you my number – and we become friends - I can talk to you like I talk to Tanya."

That warmed her heart, seeing as he didn't like her an hour ago. "Absolutely, and when I don't need to come over here you can send me a message or call me if you want someone to talk to."

"Okay. But I don't want to be your boyfriend."

She desperately wanted to laugh, but they would only upset his feelings. "You don't have to be."

"Okay. Do you want to be my girlfriend?"

"I'm absolutely fine with just being your friend, Edward."

_0-0_

Twenty minutes passed, American Chopper ended and Bella decided to ask Edward on his interests.

"I like music, but not rock or rap; it hurts my ears."

"I love to listen to music, too. I see you play the piano?"

"Yes."

Although it was hard to have a conversation with Edward, Bella never felt any awkwardness around him; she simply asked another question. "I wish I could play an instrument. What else do you enjoy doing to relax?"

"I like reading, and I play baseball with Dad sometimes."

"Aw, that's lovely – you'll have nice memories when you're older then." Edward nodded. Searching the room, Bella came across a wide range of action figures set up on the top shelf of a book stand. "Hey, these are cool."

"They are Lord of the Rings characters – I nearly have all of them, I just need Gollum." Edward joined her at the foot of the stand, looking up to the many plastic figures standing to attention. He was able to name each one by name without even having to stop to think.

"I love the look of this one…" Bella went to pick up the female elf, Galadriel with her flowing white outfit and the twisting blonde hair that went down to her stomach.

To see Bella going to touch his things – _again – _had sudden rage run through Edward before he could control it.

"Don't touch my stuff!" He shouted. The anger made Bella step back with a deer-in-headlights look on her face. "I said already not to touch my stuff and you didn't listen! You never listen! You'll break it, like you broke my pencil! You are not a good friend!"

Before any of them realised what was about to occur, Edward had his hands on Bella's tiny shoulders and pushed them back with force. He only meant to make her step back, but the power that went into his attack had her jumping at least a foot away before falling straight onto her back, making a loud bang echo around the house.

Emmett, over-hearing his brother's shouting was heading to check on them but he only arrived once the push had happened. He saw Bella rubbing the back of her head where she clearly smacked it off the ground and then saw Edward, who looked like he was about to cry, stepping away in disgrace.

"Edward what the fuck did you do?! Jesus Bella, are you okay?" Emmett knelt to the ground to do whatever he could to help Bella sit up, she was clearly in some obvious pain because the wince on her face only became stronger as she sat up, and her hands were supporting her lower back.

"Um…I think…I think I should go home now."

Esme then arrived on scene, apologised profusely to Bella and then made sure Emmett helped her to her car so that Esme could have a little word with her crying son in the corner.

_0-0_

That evening, Bella had had a long soak in the bath to soothe her aching back, took some high strength pain killers and went to have an early night, but the vibration of her phone broke her attention.

It was from Edward.

**I'm sorry. Will you still be my friend?**

_0-0_

**I want to be Edward's friend! I'm planning on doing weekly updates from now on, so the next one will be next Wednesday. Let's see if we can beat 26 reviews, yeah?! GO! **


	3. Chapter 3

YOU GUYS F'CKING ROCK AND I LOVE YOU ALL! So, here is my reward to you…SUPER-DUPER EARLY UPDATE!

**IMPORTANT: **A few of you have been asking where I got the title 'Iris' from so I'll explain it here…When planning this story the song 'Iris' by Goo-Goo Dolls (verse in first chapter) came on my iPod and the lyrics fit Edward _perfectly_, I then started hearing the song everywhere when I never used to hear it before, so I kinda saw it as a sign. The song itself is beautiful and I could listen to it over and over…please check it out!

**Disclaimer: **I OWNS NU-HIN.

**Chapter three.**

Edward was a bad friend.

Bad friends don't hurt other friends, and he hurt his friend. That made him a bad person.

Emmett was shouting and saying bad words.

Bella was holding her head and her eyes kept closing tight.

Esme came into the room and then Bella left.

She didn't say goodbye or even look at Edward.

But that's because he's a bad friend.

Edward didn't feel good, he didn't like that Bella left and he certainly didn't like that he was the one to cause that. His started to cry and he hid in the corner of the room – because he was a bad person and bad people need to be punished.

Esme crept over slowly. She wasn't smiling, which happens when she felt 'good', so she felt bad too. She sat down in front of Edward and brought his hand away from his face to hold it between hers.

"Can you tell me what happened, Edward?"

"I'm a bad person…," is all he mumbled whilst sniffing loudly.

"You're not a bad person; you just didn't make the right choice."

"But I am! Bella didn't look good, and so I'm a bad friend and she doesn't want to be my friend anymore."

Esme tried her question again, "can you tell me what happened?"

This time Edward explained everything that had happened during their couple of hours together, in more detail than was needed. "I told Bella not to touch my stuff because she breaks my stuff like she broke my pencil. I talked to Tanya and told Bella that Tanya is not my girlfriend and I'm not her boyfriend and I gave her my number so that we could be friends – but not boyfriend and girlfriend because I don't want to have sexy with her. She said she would be my friend. We watched American Chopper and talked. Bella saw my action figures and went to touch Galadriel but I told her not to touch my stuff! She would break it like she broke my pencil and then I pushed her and now she doesn't want to be my friend because I'm a bad person and bad friends don't have friends."

"Oh, Sweetheart, Bella wouldn't have broken Galadriel."

"Yes she would! She always breaks my stuff!"

"Even though you didn't like her touching your things doesn't mean you had to push her. Bella is hurt now, Edward, and we don't hurt people when they make a mistake."

"But she doesn't want to be my friend now and she said she would like to."

"Maybe Bella will come around. But you know what you do when you make the wrong choice? You apologise; tell Bella you're sorry and she might change her mind." Esme knew not to say 'she will change her mind' because Edward takes everything literally, and if the unfortunate happens and Bella decides she couldn't help out, he wouldn't understand why Esme lied to him.

"I'm hungry."

He noticed a smile form on his mother's face. She checked her watch, "it is twenty-six minutes to two, and so shall we go downstairs and have some lunch?"

"Yes. I need to use the bathroom."

"Well you go to the bathroom and I'll meet you in the kitchen."

_0-0_

Edward spent the rest of the day doing what he usually does – he played an online computer game and beat his high score by eleven points; he watched 'Spiderman' and quoted every single line out-loud; he played his piano and he talked to Tanya again.

**EdwardAMC: **It's my birthday soon.

**TanyaBabe09: **Is it babes?! :)

**EdwardAMC: **Yes. June 20th.

**TanyaBabe09: **Aw lucky you! Mines not till October.

**EdwardAMC: **Cool. You should come to my house for my birthday because you're my friend.

**TanyaBabe09: **I'd love to! Tell me nearer the time and we can plan it :)

During dinner that evening, Carlisle heard about what had happened earlier on and reminded Edward that he was meeting Heidi (his psychiatrist) the next day and told him to tell her what had happened. Edward promised that he would.

At eight thirty-two he had a slice of white bread – toasted for thirty seconds with a tiny scraping of butter – a strawberry yoghurt and another glass of milk. He got changed into his pyjamas at eight forty-nine, went to the bathroom one last time, cleaned his teeth and was in bed by nine o'clock exactly. He checked his cell phone, but Bella hadn't sent a text message. His mother's words from earlier ran through his mind – _tell Bella you're sorry._

And so he did.

**I'm sorry. Will you still be my friend?**

Three minutes later, his phone chimed.

**Please don't apologise, I should have remembered what you said. I will still be your friend.**

That made Edward smile. He felt good now, not bad.

**Thank you. Will you come back to my house?**

It took twelve minutes for Bella to reply this time. Maybe she doesn't want to come to his house anymore.

**Yes.**

It was now seventeen minutes past nine, and so he had broken his rule about going to sleep at nine fifteen. But he didn't want to stop text messaging Bella.

**Good. I see Heidi tomorrow; she will make me a good person again.**

**Edward, you are a great, great person. Please, don't forget that.**

**Not today – I was a bad person today. I made a bad choice with you and you are my friend.**

**That was an accident; even good people have accidents. **

When his clock clicked to nine thirty-two, Edward didn't like being awake anymore.

**Will you come to my house tomorrow?**

**If you need me to be there, then I will come to your house if I can, okay?**

**Cool. Goodnight.**

**Goodnight, Edward.**

_0-0_

His meetings with Heidi are something that Edward was not too fond of. He didn't like that he had to go to the hospital to see her; that he was left outside for sixteen minutes whilst Carlisle and Esme spoke privately with her; and he didn't like that no-one was there to keep him company. He sent Bella a text message saying '_Hi.' _and when she replied he said that he was waiting to talk to Heidi, but he didn't like it. Simply talking to Bella made Edward feel a bit better, but he couldn't pin-point why that is.

When he entered Heidi's office, he noticed the round table she sat at and all the colourful art work tacked to her walls – Edward had drawn a picture for her years ago, but it probably wasn't there anymore. She also had a pad of paper and a pen in front of her, to write notes on during their lesson.

"Good morning, Edward. How are you today?" Edward only nodded and flashed his hand out in a small wave. "Why don't you sit down and we'll see how you've been doing, yeah?"

It took Edward some time to sit down and pay full attention towards Heidi, but he was listening soon enough. "Mom and Dad told me you had a bit of a problem yesterday; do you want to tell me what happened?" Edward relayed the same story that he told Esme a day previous, except it took almost twice as long.

Heidi nodded and reached under the table to get something. She brought out five pieces of card and laid them out for Edward to see. Each card had a facial expression on the front and, together, Heidi and Edward had been working through them.

"Can you tell me how you felt when it happened?"

One face had a smile, which Edward knew is when someone feels good, and he didn't feel good, so it wasn't that. Another face had an upside down smile and it was crying, like Edward yesterday…and so, with the tip of a finger, he lightly touched the card.

Together, the two worked through feeling sad and guilty for hurting Bella, what he likes about her, (that her eyes and hair are the colour of chocolate and he likes chocolate) but most of all, Heidi helped Edward sort out his anger with the hope that by the time they meet again, he wouldn't have used physical violence on anyone. She has to teach him this every session, but Heidi had a feeling that he'll take it in this time, all thanks to a certain new friend.

In the car on the way home, Edward had his headphones on and was listening to music on his iPod to block out the noise of the traffic. He pushed one headphone behind his ear when he wanted to say something.

"Dad, Mom, what am I doing for my birthday?"

Esme turned around in her seat, "you can do whatever you want, Sweetheart, because it is your special day."

Usually they have a meal with the immediate family, but Edward wanted to do something different this year. "Can Bella come to our house?"

"Absolutely! I think that would be a great idea."

"But…I want Tanya to come as well…and she won't be able to if Bella comes…"

"Why do you say that?"

"Because I already have one friend coming."

Carlisle and Esme cannot remember the last time their son has had _two _friends who he could invite to his birthday meal, and that thought alone warms their heart like nothing else.

"Son, you can invite however many people you want. If you would like Tanya and Bella then that is fine with us."

For the rest of the journey home, Edward couldn't rub the smile off his face.

_0-0_

**I have put a picture of my sister and I as my avatar, just 'cause I thought it would be appropriate for this story ;) **

**I clearly suck at only 1 chapter a week, so let's just say I'll see you when I see you ;)**

**Leave me your comments and tell me what you think! **


	4. Chapter 4

**LONGEST CHAPTER SO FAR!**

**Disclaimer: **I don't. Stephenie does.

**Chapter four.**

To wake up with unread text messages is not unusual for Bella, but to find five (all from the same person) and a missed call is something she's never encountered. As well as the messages from Edward, there was also one from her close friend, Jasper.

Edward's read:

**8:47 – Hi.**

**9:03 – American Chopper isn't on this morning.**

**9:07 – I'm watching Spiderman.**

**9:28 – I paused Spiderman. Eating Fruit Loops now.**

**9:42 – **_1 Missed Call_

**9:59 – Do you not want to talk to me?**

"Oh, shit." She groaned, exiting out of Edward's messages and going to Jasper's. His read: **9:13 – Hey Bell, are we still on for meeting at 1****st**** beach later? **"Oh, double shit!" Not only had she slept through her alarm and, in the process, sent Edward into a complete state of worry, but she had also forgotten about her plans with Alice and Jasper when she had made plans with Edward. If Bella told Edward that she was meeting her friends, he would automatically think that she didn't want to be with him, which is far from the truth, and so she either had to let him down gently…or see if he wanted to join Bella, Alice and Jasper… Either way, she had a major challenge on her hand.

First things first, Bella replied to Jasper's text and briefly asked if they would mind Edward tagging along. He replied whilst she was shoving on the first clothes her hands grabbed.

**10:31 – That's fine with us, Bells. As long as he's comfortable with it.**

Fortunately, Jasper was in the same course as Bella, which meant he had had experience and, unlike some people, he doesn't shy away from those who society views as 'different'. His girlfriend, Alice, is the sort of person who makes everyone welcome in whichever scenario they are in.

Next on her list of things to do, Bella typed out a rapid response to Edward at the same time as getting herself ready to leave the house.

**10:36 – I'm so sorry, Edward, I slept through my alarm and only just woke up! I'm about to leave now… if you still want me to come over?**

**10:37 – Yes.**

Within fifteen minutes, Bella was parked outside the Cullen house and had spotted Esme waving happily from the kitchen window; she returned the gesture when heading to the front door, which had been left unlocked. Thankfully there was no sign of Edward when Bella entered; this gave her time to speak to Esme privately. Together, they discussed Bella's idea about meeting Jasper and Alice etc. and Esme saw no problem with it, just as long as Edward felt comfortable.

"He has a tendency to sprout out all the facts he knows when he's nervous, so you can keep that in mind. But apart from that I think it would be great for him to meet new people his age."

Edward was sitting cross legged on his bed when Bella went in. He had something on his lap – _an iPad? – _Bella couldn't tell what it was for certain, but Edward was busy playing a game on it, sliding his finger up or down the screen and occasionally moving the devise from side to side.

"Good morning, Edward. I'm so sorry I slept through your phone call and messages this morning." Edward ignored everything she was saying and continued to play this game, so she tried another tactic. "What game are you playing?"

"Um…Temple…um…Temple Run."

"I've never played that, is it good?" Their conversation ended, because Edward only nodded.

It took an additional fifteen minutes for Bella to get Edward away from his game, but even then he wasn't cooperating. She didn't want to be cruel and forceful, but she had plans to meet friends and if Edward wasn't going to cooperate then he can just stay at home and play his game.

"Hey, Edward, I have plans to meet my friends today and -."

"But…I thought I am your friend."

"And you are! But I have other friends too, and I was going to go to the beach today to meet them. Would you like to come along with me?"

"Um…okay…"

Bella had not expected for him to agree so quickly, or at all! "Really? Oh, that's great. They are really nice so I'm sure you'll like them."

"What are their names?"

"Jasper and Alice." Edward was now sitting on the edge of his bed, playing with the draw string of his sweat pants (the ones he always wears) and kicked his bare feet against the bed frame. "But if you want to go you'll need to get ready now. So can you put some socks on, please?"

Like before, Edward ignored Bella's question and paid more attention to his swinging feet. When Bella passed him some thick, white sport socks Edward flew out in an unnecessary rage, "I don't like those ones, stupid!"

Bella put her knowledge back to good use – stay calm and talk them through it. "Then can you tell me which ones you _do _like?" No answer. "Edward, how am I meant to know if you don't tell me?"

"Argh!" He groaned, falling back onto his bed and then flipping over so he lay face down.

"If this is about your socks -,"

Plugging his ears with a finger, Edward transformed into a four year old, ignoring what anyone said. "La-la-la-la-la…"

For the first time, Bella was completely boggled. Yes, he wasn't paying any attention when playing his game, but she knew that the attention span of an Autistic child/person when they are already engrossed in something is zilch. But what she didn't understand is why he would flip out so suddenly, when everything was going pretty well?

"I want my mom." She barely heard his quiet voice but thankfully she did – you wouldn't want to ask them twice when in this attitude.

Once Esme came into the room, Bella took a back seat role and observed how different Edward was around his mother. It was like nothing had happened and that Bella had imagined his fit not five minutes ago. Paying more attention to their conversation, Bella heard Esme giving Edward two choices.

"You can go out and have a lovely day with Bella and her friends, or you can stay here and play in your room. Now, which one would you like to do?"

Edward whispered his answer too quietly for Bella to hear, but Esme encouraged him to speak a bit louder. "I want to…I-I want to…stay…with you…Bella."

"And that is absolutely fine with me, Edward, but you can't go in bare feet, can you?" He shook his head, "how about I go to the bathroom and see if you can put on your socks and shoes before I return?" Eager for a challenge, Edward bounded off his bed and raced to his sock drawer, determined to beat Bella in her little challenge.

Edward was standing proudly and ready to go when Bella came back through. "I won! I won!" He cheered, doing a little dance in excitement.

They finally left the house almost an hour after Bella first arrived.

0-0

"I like my car better…" Edward admitted, inspecting Bella's ancient truck and pulling at bits of metal that were hanging off and picking at the tufts of wool coming from the leather seats.

"A lot of people prefer their car to mine." Bella wasn't offended by his direct feelings on her Chevy, she knows that he never lies and wouldn't ever sugar-coat what he's feeling.

"Next time we can take my car because I don't like it in here."

"You're perfectly safe."

Bella hoped that would soothe his worrying, but Edward continued to ridicule her without even knowing so. "My car was brand new when we bought it."

'_Well, we're not all made of money' _is what she wanted to say, but, of course, she didn't.

"That's because you're lucky enough to have parents who can provide you with gifts like that."

"Does your dad not have enough money for a brand new car like mine?"

"If he had to, he could afford to buy a new car, but when I was growing up he put money towards my college tuition and so there wasn't enough to buy one first hand."

"Can we stop talking now, please?" This is something that Edward does when he wants to be quiet for a while; he'd cover his ears and close his eyes; slowly calming back to a peaceful state.

Bella thought it was the best thing he had said during the whole journey.

0-0

It had been a couple of weeks since Bella had left her college room she shares with Alice and Jasper, they all embraced in an awkward three-way hug with the occasional squeal coming from Alice. Bella instantly remembered Edward was standing right behind them and prayed that he didn't get upset over the chemistry she has with other people when he doesn't have a friendship like this with anyone.

"Edward," She turned with a smile on her face, "these are my friends Alice and Jasper." She pointed to each in turn.

"You didn't have to tell me, because Jasper is a boy name, so obviously the girl wouldn't be called Jasper."

"No, sorry, I was only making sure you remembered their names."

Edward gave Bella another incredulous look, "why would I forget their names? You told me when I was at my house and I have a really good memory."

Sensing Bella's struggles, Jasper decided to jump in and save her from anymore slip-ups. "Hey, it's great to meet you, Edward." He didn't put his hand out to shake, or slap Edward's shoulder, only because he knew how touchy some can get about contact with a stranger, it turned out that Edward was too shy to even look in their direction, only in Bella's.

"Hi…" He whispered, rubbing his hands together with obvious nerves.

"If you want to go home at any point you just have to say, okay?"

"Yes."

0-0

The four friends casually strolled along the beach shore, skimming stones on the water surface and kicking at pieces of driftwood which decorated the area. Alice and Jasper were doing a great job at attempting to make Edward feel at ease, but he never broke free from his panicky shell. When Alice asked him what he liked to do Edward just shrugged and either nodded or shook his head when she mentioned different hobbies and asked if he enjoyed them.

All were stunned however the minute Edward began to talk without even being asked a question. "It's my birthday soon, Bella."

Bella couldn't have been more proud of him – he overcame his fear and spoke about something personal with two people he still sees as strangers. "Is it? When is your birthday?"

"Um, June twentieth – it's in thirty-one days and on a Wednesday and I was born at 7:04pm so I won't be twenty until 7:04pm, but I was born on that day and so we celebrate it all of that day."

"Wow, that's not very long at all."

"Will you come to birthday party?"

"I'd love to! I'd need to remember to get something special as your present then." Bella had never seen a smile so bright on his face, and seeing that reaction and knowing she caused it did some strange things with her heart.

"I think it's funny that I'm twenty on the twentieth."

She chuckled lightly, "it is a funny coincidence. I was thirteen on the thirteenth."

Edward laughed, "I like days like that. When is your birthday, Bella?"

"September thirteenth," she replied with a smile, mainly because he had just laughed and that sound beats any other.

"Okay, I'll get you a present. Second thing -,"

"Oh Bella, I have to tell you!" Alice completely cut Edward off from talking, but continued to babble her excited nonsense. She also ignored the disapproving look from Jasper. "Guess who I saw the other week…"

"Um…I don't know, who?"

"Derek!" Alice shrieked, clapping her hands and tapping her Ugg-covered feet.

"Derek?"

"Yes! Remember he was the guy we met at that party? You took his wine off him and he slapped your ass then tried to get you up to his apartment?"

Unfortunately Bella remembers that night and, regrettably, the drunken moves she played on…_Derek. _

"And? He probably doesn't even remember me, Al'."

"Oh, I think he does. Well, he remembered me anyway, and kept on passing over strange looks, clearly seeing if you were with me or not. Girl, why don't you just date him?"

Bella didn't have the time to answer, because Edward stormed up off the driftwood log they were all perched on. "Can I go home now?"

"Are you okay?" Asked Bella, worried at his apparent anger.

"I want to go home."

"Um, okay, okay. Do you two want to follow us and once I've dropped Edward home we could go for something to eat?" That was what they agreed on and turned to see Edward was already heading towards the truck with his head down and feet scuffing away at the sand.

Bella waited until they were in the privacy of her truck, just the two of them, before asking Edward on his sour mood.

"I don't like your friends." He mumbled, finding interest in picking at his thumb nail.

She hated hearing that, her hope was that he could have found two extra friends, but something obviously pissed him off. "I'm really sorry that you didn't enjoy yourself. Can you tell me why you don't like them?"

"'Cause I don't like them."

With anyone else she would have replied with, '_but that isn't a reason'. _"Was it because Alice stopped you from saying something?"

"No! I just don't like them, okay?! You're so stupid…"

"Edward you can't call someone stupid for not understanding something."

"Yeah but you're still stupid. I don't even want to be your friend anymore."

Bella gasped and her eyes glazed over with tears; that was the last thing she imagined Edward to say, especially in a malice tone like that. "What did I do wrong?"

Just like when he wanted peace and quiet, Edward covered his ears and blocked out the world. He didn't move until the truck came to a stop outside his house.

"Please tell me what I did wrong…"

"Nothing, I just don't want to be your friend. I need to talk to my brother now."

"Okay well…I'll see you -." Edward slammed the truck door and walked away, clearly not interested in anything she had to say.

Bella managed to hold back her tears until she was in the comfort of her friends, where she sobbed until her eyes stung from tears.

0-0

Edward knocked timidly on Emmett's bedroom door and rubbed at his teary eyes.

"Hey man, why are you crying?" Emmett asked, allowing his brother inside and pressing pause on his Xbox game.

"I don't feel good."

"Okay, fire away."

"I don't want to be friends with Bella anymore and that is why I don't feel good."

"Right, and why don't you want to be friends?"

"Alice told Bella (Alice is her friend, and the other one was called Jasper), Alice told Bella that she saw someone the other day, Bella said 'who?' and Alice said 'Derek!' And Alice said he touched Bella's butt a lot and she said 'girl, why don't you date him.' So I don't want to be her friend anymore, 'cause she has her friend Derek who touches her butt a lot and I don't want to touch her butt a lot."

Emmett's eyes grew wide. "Dude! You're so totally jealous! And it's obvious you want to do her."

Edward didn't understand, "do her what?"

"You wanna bone her, man!"

"Bone? Like dogs bones?" Why was Emmett difficult to understand all the time?

"No…right, let me explain it better. If Bella became boyfriend and girlfriend with his guy would you feel good or bad?"

Edward didn't even have to think of the answer. "Bad."

"Exactly. That is because you are jealous and would rather she was your girlfriend and not his."

Edward ignored that and began another approach to his problem. "You know how you're boyfriend and girlfriend with Rosalie?"

"Yes."

"Um…is that…um…because you…wanted to have…_sexy _with her?"

"Hell yeah, man! Are you saying you want to do the same with Bella?"

"No…but…well…I don't know."

Emmett put his hands out, "let's start from the beginning again. You don't want Bella to be dating this Derek guy and you felt bad when her friend -."

"—Alice."

"Right, when _Alice _mentioned that they should date, and you're not sure if you want to bang her – I mean, _have sexy with her. _Dude, it's pretty damn obvious that you want her to be your girlfriend._" _

Did this make Edward feel good or bad? He couldn't tell. He liked the idea…but he didn't like everything.

"I suggest you tell Bella you're sorry and that you still want to be here friend and then slowly turn her into your girlfriend."

Edward agreed with his brother simply because he didn't want to talk anymore.

However that evening, after playing Temple Run and making his new high score 1,267,821, we tapped on the Google Chrome app and found himself typing in the words '_How to get a girlfriend.'_

_0-0_

**Chapter Notes!  
**My sister has tantrums because of socks just like Edward did and she has literally spent the last two weeks in her pyjamas… "I've not got school tomorrow, Rose" is her excuse.

Derek is real! Sadly, the whole story from Alice is mine after getting pretty drunk at the pub…

Edward's high score on Temple Run is my sister's; I literally just copied it off her iPod.

**I have jumped back onto the bandwagon and am back on Instagram! If you're an Instagramer then follow me and I'll do the same back :) (rosiewrites)**

**If I can get to 150 reviews I'll update on Monday! I'm sure we all wanna see Edward workin' the charm ;) **


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